We are not looking good Im afraid. It's the Croydon effect. We got landed in a dump of a hotel. It's all part of a nasty plot by MI6 to put us off as Eng are **** scared of meeting us in a potential semi..
Uini Atonio our 23st prop and only playmaker can't sleep. He's not training as he prefers to take selfies all day.
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http://www.stuff.co.nz/sport/rugby/rwc-moments/72097759/the-french-are-complaining-about-their-rugby-world-cup-base-in-croydon.html
As dissent is looming again among our notoriously mercurial crowd, the hotel has provided (free of charge) new caps so that the players can recognize each other from a distance on the bustling streets of Croydon...
Cantona has been invited for some Kung fu kicks in order to lighten up the mood. Much better than golf anyway...