Yeah, I forgot to add that in addition to the middle class anti-sports snobs who like it, the other group are immigrants or second gen Aussies who have a monumental chip on their shoulders about being soccer fans. These people are utterly insufferable and act like being a soccer fan is like being black in America or something (one douchebag soccer fan cousin of mine who was born in Sweden once tried to tell me that the word "soccer" was a term of oppression and denigrated those who followed it... I told to get the **** over himself). I honestly can't stand them.
I know it's multilayered and all that, but all codes of football are. I just find soccer boring as batsh#t and can't stand the culture surrounding it. The Australian soccer fan is one of the most insufferable people on the planet; convinced of their own cultural superiority, ignorant and arrogant in the same breath regarding the terminology that can be used to refer to the sport, and generally seeking to ape European gang-like and socio-path infested soccer culture.
They're truly a vile group of people. I never really liked the game to begin with, but the fans just seal the deal in terms of destroying any prospect of me wanting anything to do with the game.
Do you also have the Socadas as I call them? This type of Canadian Soccer fan, like the "Cicada" insect emerges after years of hibernation to infest the local sporting scene at times of World Cups (and smaller spawnings around Euro and other International competitions).
Like their Hemiptera equivalent they emerge as loud chirpy and bright coloured spectacles that go forth and multiply, waving flags as opposed to wings in an ornate spectacle of bizarro nationalistic and quasi ethno-centric ritual, made all the more bizarre by the fact that 75% or more of them are born and bred Canadians.
Several sub species are particularly annoying, the Italo-Socada is known to honk car horns and clog up traffic when their team is victorious, and is totally oblivious to the fact that his team can only win by playing pedantic mind numbingly boring even by soccer standards strategies, along with a few "lucky" calls from the officials.
The Portu-Socada and Brasocada's undergo a metamorphisis, shedding their original colours and transmutating into the other species upon the elimination of whatever breed they were orignally apart of. These are three of the most annoying types but others are known to cause problems, like the Croat-Socada for example.
Very many have absolutely no interest in the game and won't watch again till the next time the tournament rolls around, nor would they support Canada if we were to make it again, as we don't have a high enough chance of winning and to the Socada success is more important that honourable victory or defeat. Did your team win through controvesy..."who cares!!!" Did your team cheat and dive to win...."that's all part of the game!!"
The only way to control this infestation is through the "poison of defeat" which eliminates a particular sub species for four years, than it's usually a matter of hoping a type that is less prevalent or obnoxious in Canada is the one of 32 that survive the cycle, thankfully in 2010 the final two teams were not too worrying for normal Canadian sports fans. Some other methods of control/avoidance include.... 1) avoiding large urban metro areas that seem to have large congregations, Toronto, Vancouver and Montreal are especially to be avoided, 2) broadcasting your love of other sports as much as possible during this time, the Socada has a particular dislike of Gridiron and Baseball and these two can ward off casual attacks.
I could mention more if others are interested and would also like to hear about the prevalence of this lifeform within your own countries so I may avoid them during the spawning phase of the four year cycle.
Cheers: Little Guy
