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Make me Laugh, TRF

Can't believe it!Washed my brand new England World Cup shirt and hung it out to dry and some f******s nicked the pegs.:D
 
[video]https://www.facebook.com/Ridichetipassaaaaaa/videos/10153629019767427/[/video]

LOL
 
I think my friend might be gay
Last night i dreamt he was bumming me
 
For those who do not listen to the 'Today' programme on Radio 4,this is English humour at its best.

Right at the end of a programme recently, there was a discussion about the obscene cost of entry into Premiership football games, the cheapest price of £60 and £100 per game is not uncommon.

An older chap being interviewed said he could recall many years ago arriving at the turnstiles (it was probably West Ham United): "That will be ten quid, mate".

“What?!" the old chap said "I could get a woman for that!"

The guy on the turnstile retorted, "Not for 45 minutes each way with a brass band and a meat pie in the interval, you wouldn't!"
 
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I have no idea what the heck is going on here, but it's so bad it's brilliant!
 
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The 80 mph question can't be answered. You have to take certain things into account. Stoplights, traffic, turns, and Friction have to be taken into account.
 
A good looking girl walks into a bar and asks the barman for a double entendre ..........and the barman gives her one.
 
A horse learns to play guitar and he's really good at it do he thinks why not start up a band. So, he recruits his friend the pig to play drums and his friend the cow to play the bass. The band becomes a great success and they go on world tours. One day when travelling from America to the UK the plane crasges and the horses bassist friend the cow and drummer friend the pig die. Upon being rescued and reaching the UK the horse feels that he has to drown his sorrows in alcohol, so the horse walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?"
 
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