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Melbourne Rebels fly-half Danny Cipriani has revealed he suffered with depression after being dropped by England.
The 23-year-old exploded onto the international stage in 2008 but injuries, a lack of form and a reported row with the England management saw the talented playmaker fall out of favour. He considered giving up the sport last season before opting for a move to the fledgling Australian Super Rugby franchise he now calls home where he is hoping to re-build his career and reputation.
"I suffered from depression but that was months ago and everything is a lot more positive in my life now," Cipriani told the Sydney Morning Herald. "It's a hard thing to go through on your own, and the worst thing you can do is bottle everything up inside.
"You end up feeling more lonely and frightened and then the problem gets bigger and bigger. Talking to a counsellor is nothing to be ashamed of because it's their job and they understand, and having people who love you supporting you also makes a big difference."
Cipriani made his return to action in the Rebels' victory over Tonga last weekend and took on a starring role in their re-match on Friday. And the former Wasps star is glad to be able to hit the headlines for the right reasons after reports of disquiet on his arrival in Melbourne.
"People have been saying a lot of things about me, that I have been difficult and angry," he told The Sun. "But that just isn't the case. It frustrates me only to the point where my mum hears about it, then she gets upset. I tell her that everything is just fine and it's sorted. It comes with the territory, I know that. But I wish someone would tell me what it is I am doing wrong. I have no problem with constructive criticism."
Cipriani's next goal is to ensure the Rebels make a sizeable impression in their debut season but a return to England colours is never too far from his mind. "I try not to think too much about not pulling on that (England) shirt again because it upsets me,'' he said.
"The plan is to eventually return home. But, first, I want to succeed here. I knew being so far away would make it difficult to play for England. But no matter where you are in the world, if you are the best in your position the chance will come. I am here to do the best job possible and learn enough so, when I do return, I can get back into the England side. The World Cup this year will always be in the back of my mind.''
http://www.espnscrum.com/super-rugby-2011/rugby/story/132793.html